we're praying for you

Nous implorons la miséricorde de Dieu;

non afin qu'il nous laisse en paix dans nos vices mais afin qu'il nous en délivre.

We implore the mercy of God, not that He may leave us at peace in our vices, but that He may deliver us from them.

- Pascal -


....Let this blest assurance control,

That Christ has regarded my helpless estate ....

- Spafford -

Eternal Father, strong to save,

Whose arm hath bound the restless wave

- Whiting -

Abba Father, in Thee we trust.

for Esther and David

Something More

Everything's changed, and I want to believe
There must be a reason, there just has to be
Cause my faith is strong, till it all hits home
And it's not enough for me to trust
When it hurts too much

On the days I feel like I've failed you
The days I feel I've been failed
I need to praise You
For I am Yours, I'm Yours

Where is the power, to give what I gave
Give back the strength
Give back the faith I had yesterday
Cause you are my God
You are my Great I Am
And I know I have fallen but..
I have landed in healing hands

On the days I feel like I've failed you
The days I feel I've been failed
I need to praise You
For I am Yours, I'm Yours

And in my frailty, you lead me to something more
So I close my eyes, cause inside my heart
I believe, that I'm not alone
You'll always be there for me

On the days I feel like I've failed you
The days I feel I've been failed
I know that I need to praise You
For I am yours, still yours
Cause I believe you lead me to something more
Something more, something more


by: Kristy Starling

lesson from lemon

This week I learned a lesson through my sore throat and cold (dohh still nyambung ye, ga beres2...). Oh btw, thanks for your prayers, I have now regained my voice again and the cold/flu is GONE. Yeaaaach! I think I spent 3 big chunk of lemons and 1 medium bottle of honey for the past 4-5 days. AND IT WORKS, MY FRIENDS! Believe it or not, it works! Just have a good amount of rest, a plentiful amount of drink, and take some standard medicines if you need.
Ok. What kind of lesson I'm talking about? It's about a lesson of life. I tell you a secret.
I hate lemons and I hate honey.
Yaiks!
Are you kidding me?
Just to be frank. I never liked those stuffs. However, it was really interesting that when I realize that I got the cold and flu problem, I remember an old advice to take those stuffs. So before the problem got worse, I just drank 'em though I hate 'em
Well, now I'm gonna talk about another thing. I asked a fren about going to the gym to exercise. I've been doing that more intensely since I'm here in L-ville. I asked him how often he went exercise while he was still actively doing that. He said quite often.
Let me tell you another secret. I used to hate running and lifting weights or exercise. Now? I do it again and again.
Bottom line is, I'm trying to apply the principle taken from these realities in life. There are times in our lives where we should have done something necessary for the benefits of our lives, but we reluctant to do it. The problem could be anything. Take an easy example. Which one sounds better? Studying for test or watching movies while enjoying chips n dips? I guess most people would answer the latter is the easiest one. We are humans inclined to do the BAD rather than the GOOD. (No matter how good we are. Ever feel that way?) Our sinful and selfish nature preoccupies that we would rather choose evil than good. I have to admit that this is one of my weaknesses. I'm in the point of life where I'm trying to do something GOOD based to the fact that I need it, although I might having the "hate" feelings of doing it. And I believe everyone would agree that it's not easy at all. Anywhere at one point of our lives, we will have to drink the sour-ness of the lemon of life. And there's more sour in it than in the regular lemon. (Everybody still agree????) I learned this through the sickness. Still a whole lot thing to learn. Well, the bad news is that it's much easier to talk than to do it. The good news is, there's no way we can do it except by relying to God's grace. That's all.

Lord, help me... help us.

aretha franklin

I almost lost my voice.
It was started from having a sort of cold a couple days ago. I didn't have a runny nose but I knew that something's wrong. Three days ago I was still practicing and I can reach high notes so I thought everything was fine. The following day, we went down to Nashville and it was still ok. Yesterday, I started to realize that something's wrong with my throat. Earlier this week, I already drank honey and lemon water. TODAY, I could not sing during the practice with the accompanist. It was more like Aretha Franklin's low-low voice. Ouch.
At least I don't lose all my voice and do grateful for that. Another effect is, somehow I can listen to my voice more clearly (I guess it's because the "mindeng"ness), so it sounded a bit different, hehehe...
Hope I'll get my voice again pretty soon.

*dadidudidoodoo....*

from weakness to meekness

The past few days and even until today, I've got several messages. Not text messages (sms) or those other kinds, but the above message. It could be because I'm at one of the lowest/weakest point so I got all these multilayered thoughts to reflect (?) Sometimes when God speaks to us intensively, it means we really need that, doesn't it? One of them came from Pastor Ryan Fullerton's preaching this past Sunday morning at Immanuel. He was speaking about the "impossibles."

1. Christian life is impossible
It is not hard, difficult, demanding, challenging, nor it is doable, but it is impossible. There is a big difference between becoming a Christian and being a Christian.
2. Christian forgiveness is impossible.
70x7 in human terms could end in bitterness, divorce, civil war, or even genocide.
3. Christian suffering is impossible
Too many examples to describe. Paul often found himself on near-to-death experience in his life.
4. Christian ministry is impossible.
It is not only about using gifts and talents, but it's about crucifix, laying down our life for others.

In short, the Christian is always against the impossible. But praise the Lord. Just as Joshua led God's people to cross that mighty Jordan river (in Joshua 3-4), which was impossible to do, we can acknowledge our weaknesses and depend to God. Yes, we know that Christian life is impossible, and it's not our job to make it possible, either. Our challenge is to turn the focus, from our weakness, all the impossibles, difficulty, suffering, failures... etc., to God's presence. This is our part, and this is still possible. God is the One who works in the realm of the impossibles anyway, not us. Always remember that God can do the impossible.

As long as we're stick with Him, all impossibles can be possible.

hello

I've only talked with him once but I got this in my inbox.

........

As Christians, it behooves us to live out our faith 24/7 and to understand that we may be under the microscope at any given moment. Genesis 17:1b says, “I am Almighty God; walk before Me and be blameless.” In other words, Christians should spend every day attempting to live blamelessly before God. And, we should also live blamelessly before others.

But is it even possible to live a blameless or faultless life?
Of course not.
We are all victims of our fleshly nature. Certainly we cannot fully live out our faith on our own.
Attempting to do so is nothing beyond a prescription for failure.

Living lives of diligent faith can be accomplished only when we completely trust God to be preeminent in our lives.
This begins with daily prayer and Bible reading so that our hearts are prepared to be worthy representatives of Christ at home, in the workplace and in our backyards.
This also begins by being honest with ourselves, identifying our weaknesses and casting those cares upon Christ, knowing that we cannot address our own flaws and inadequacies apart from Him.

Robert Murray M’Cheyne (1813-1843) said, “What a man is alone on his knees before God, that he is, and no more.”

Apart from Scripture, there may be no more powerful statement ever made regarding the Christian life. It cuts to the core of our beings.
We cannot lie before God or bargain with Him because He knows our every thought and motive. At the same time, He is also our great advocate who wants to forgive our sins and to facilitate our quest for holiness.

Here is the greatest thing about the Christian life: we have the Spirit of God living within us. In John 14:17, Jesus stated, “… but ye know Him; for He dwelleth with you and shall be with you.”

What comfort He gives in trying times.

What encouragement He gives in difficult times.

What wisdom He gives in uncertain times.

What friendship He gives in lonely times.

In return, should we not be living our lives so that others want to understand the joys of knowing Christ?
If indeed the Spirit of God lives within us, we have a source of strength that allows us to live above our capabilities; we can actually live beyond ourselves through Christ.
So then, when we serve God in sincerity and in truth (Joshua 24:14), not only can we live victoriously, we don’t have to wonder if people who are observing us are seeing a proper picture of the Christian life.

Not I, but Christ

Pastor Jonathan Falwell

psalm 42

Why art thou cast down, O my soul?
and why art thou disquieted in me?
hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise him for the help of his countenance
Deep calleth unto deep at the noise of thy waterspouts:
all thy waves and thy billows are gone over me.
Yet the LORD will command his lovingkindness in the day time,
and in the night his song shall be with me,
and my prayer unto the God of my life.


-king david-

question

Has anybody ever experienced that you have to do something (your responsibility), but you just don't want to do it at the moment???
Kaya yang susaaaah bener gitu? Padahal sebetulnya simple...

Eegghhh...

quote for today... hmm... this week ....?

God is absolutely not concerned about whether you're (I'm) having a great day today. What God is fired up about is producing the likeness of Christ in you (me), for your (my) own good and for His glory. That's real, selfless love. God has dreams for you (me); God sees things in you (me) that could be if you (I) would allow Him to demonstrate His fullest work in your (my) heart and life. That's God's love that He's working out for your (my) highest good.

James McDonald

credit

stinkin (long) day!

day one

Hari ini gue memulai 'chapter baru' (jayus ah) di SBTS. Waktu kemaren ini perwalian/advising, belon apa2 gue uda dikasi 'warning' sama academic advisor, kan gua ceritanya ambil 13, eh... dia bilang.. "Sam, that's too much." Tapi, dasar ini otak uda jalan duluan, sebelum dia ngomong gitu, gue udah punya senjata amunisi.... hehehe gue tunjukin dah itu jadwal lengkap yg gua bikin berikut kelas-kelas yg gua ambil.... Alhasil, si dosen ini "nurut" hehehe.. malah akhirnya dari 13 credit, jadi 14, krn ada salah perhitungan... Eh, begitu pulang, gue baru nyadar, ternyata masih ada salah perhitungan juga..... jadinya merangkak ke angka "15." Intinya ada 4 kelas teori yg gua ikutin: Musicianship I (teori dasar musik), Intro to Music Ministry, Intro to Hymnology, sama Contemporary Expressions of Worship. Itu semua jadi 10 credits. Sisanya yg 5 itu berupa pre-grad voice class, piano class, sama 2 choirs. Alamaaaaxx... Masi belon selesai. Gue kerja 16 jam di warnet, dan ronda 2 jam di warung kopi... tiap Senin malem... (oh ya, gue blm cerita, kopi disini ga enakkk banget.. hoekks....) Pokonya seru banget deh semester ini. Hehehe.. jadi inget pas dulu kuliah di Unpar semester pertama, jadi sarjana "intro" or "pengantar." Well, liat aja deh nti gimane sepak terjangnya... Apalagi sekarang ini tiap kelas most likely bakal ada PR utk setiap pertemuan... tuh.. seru khaaan?

the art of art

Ok. Libur Summer 2007 udah menginjak minggu ke.... ke brp yah? Lupa eui.... pokonya yg jelas skrg kita ada di hari pertama bulan Agustus.... wakkhhhhh????????????? Bentar lagi masuk semester fall donk? IYa!!!!!!!!!!! Idih prasaan gue baru pindahan gitu dari Lynchburg (desa). Well, gue udah ampir 3 minggu kerja di SBTS. Sebelumnya gue cuma bisa bilang ini semua krn berkat Tuhan. I mean, dari awal. Gua dapet kesempatan utk kerja di 2 tempat sekaligus, ternyata.... Gak cuma Founder's Cafe tapi juga di Computer Lab. 2 minggu lalu tepatnya, gua ditelp supervisor lab ditawarin kerja, tadinya emang gua uda apply kerja disini cuma ntah gimana ada org lain yg applicationnya diforward duluan, jadi gue kesusul padahal gue yg lebih dulu diinterview. Well, lumayan cape juga sih kerja di 2 tempat, apalagi dua-duanya sama2 spesialis jaga "warung." Satu warung kopi, satu warung internet... hehehe.... Dua-duanya sama2 hrs menangani "pelanggan." Sekarang baru mulai kerasa nihhhhh capenya. Walaupun gua bersyukur krn ga ada masalah dlm adjustment kerja di 2 tempat ini. Kaya misalnya hari ini walaupun baru 2 minggu kerja di Founder's, gua udah dipercaya nge-training 1 anak yg baru masuk kerja juga, hari kedua. Dohhh padahal itu cafe jual barang kayanya cukup banyak jg. Gue tadi masuk jam 3 sore sampe jam 7 kurang, terus langsung lanjoooottttt ke Comp. Lab ngeronda dari jam 7 sampe 11 mlm. Haiaaa! Bablas!!!!
Ok. Itu soal kerja. Now, about my preparation for placement exam in the school of church music. Gue uda dapet jadwal dan apa2 aja yg mesti bakal diuji. Bisa lolos semua? In your dreams, deh. Gua ga ada rencana ngegol-in semua. Well, ada beberapa hal basic yg gua coba dan do-able (or feasible) buat ditembusin... such as: piano proficiency, sightsinging, sama conducting. Yg laen2nya seperti written harmony, ear training, orchestration, history-literature, dll... jangan ngimpii deh.... uda jelas gue ga pernah menyentuh makanan2 begituan, so gue uda siap2 bakal ambil kelas2 pre-grad ini semua. Tapi yg di atas 3 tadi, well, mo dicoba sebisanya supaya bisa lolos kelas2 itu jadi gak usah ambil lagi.
Well, skrg konsentrasi gue beralih ke nyiapin "conducting." Ada bbrp buku yg lagi dibaca2 dan ini sekarang juga lagi liatin contoh orang2 conducting di youtube. Terakhir conduct padsu (yg serius) gue inget pas PS SMUK1 mo ikutan FPS ITB taun 2000, dohh itu teh kenangan pahit gara2 kita kalah sama Aloy (HERAN!! mrk kok bisa2nya nyanyiin lagu pilihan bebas dan lagu "bebas" yang SAMA PERSIS sama kita..., pulang2 festival pada nangis pedihhh semua.. trophy bergilir batal jadi trophy tetap gara2 dicolong.... hahaha).
Soal piano, I guess kuncinya ada di practice and practice.... (practice makes perfect... yea yea..)
Well, semua juga perlu practice... namanya juga seni... Balik lagi soal kerja di cafe, gue sempet deg2an pas disuruh bikin "Calzone" ... hah? paan tuh Calzone? Gue cuma liat temen gue bikin sekali, eh pas kebagian gue yg bikin, yg pesen mintanya 4 biji.... Halahhhhh.... Bikinan yg pertama mengandalkan teori, yg kedua mengandalkan 1x kesalahan, yg ketiga mengandalkan 2x bikin sblmnya which is teori dan kesalahan. Yg keempat? Mengandalkan ke-malu-an... hehehe, maksudnya malu2in kalo uda 3x bikin berurutan masi tetep salah juga....


*calzone itu mirip pizza isinya tapi adonannya ditutup jadi kaya martabak asin*

spirit talk

Many of us appear to be all right in general, but there are still some areas in which we are careless and lazy, it is not a matter of sin, but the remnants of our carnal life that tend to make us careless. Carelessness is an insult to the Holy Spirit....

Not only must our relationship to God be right, but the outward expression of that relationship must also be right. ....

God will bring us back in countless ways to the same point over and over again. And He never tires of bringing us back to that one point until we learn the lesson, because His purpose is to produce the finished product. It may be a problem arising from our impulsive nature, but again and again, with the most persistent patience, God has brought us back to that one particular point. ...

Beware of becoming careless over the small details of life and saying, "Oh that will have to do for now." Whatever it may be, God will point it out with persistence until we become entirely His..

cf. James 1:4

oc-mufhh

SPIDERMAN 4: Finale

Jangan maen-maen sama yg namanya BAYGON.

summer story

Today I've started to work again. I'm now working at Founder's Cafe at our school. It's really an interesting job, it really is. Not only interesting but you also have to be able to do different stuffs. I'm now able to make pizza in just 10-15 minutes, that's the easiest one by the way. There are some other menus in our cafe/coffeeshop like different sandwiches or wraps. I have to be able to make those.... fheww.. it was fun though....
Since now we're still on summer time, there aren't many people around the school, not as many as the regular semester. Usually, the line at Founder's Cafe could be really tough especially during lunch hours or even morning coffee/breakfast time. It would drive us crazy. Today, I was taught how to make pizza, sandwiches and subs, smoothies, coffee..etc.
Our manager, Ken, is actually out of town this week, so I was trained by a fellow worker. Btw, talking about Ken's leaving for vacation, I guess everybody's happy with that (??!??)... My friend told me, yeach, it's good for him, good for us, good for everybody... hahhahaha... Wait until you see our manager, probably you'd understand... He's a cool dude actually.... but unique too... Speaking about espri't de corps here, I guess our cafe is running a good business. Well, I began to learn new things in my job, I have no choice, but I like it so far. The good thing is... since I got the evening shift which means closing time, I can bring home some donuts and muffins (left overs)... yumm... They're good... and FREE (that's the best part)!

Speaking about school, I'm still finishing up two paperworks for THE WORSHIPPING CHURCH class, they're due this week. Then, I still have to prepare for my placement exam in the following August. Still have to practice several piano repertoires and hymns and one singing repertoire. I think that's the only area where I can do most. Maybe this is one of the advantages of transferring school during Summer where you can prepare your stuffs earlier, do some classes earlier, and work too...in order to get a spoon of rice and a bucket of diamonds (lol... Indo idioms)...

no idea

Udah lama gue ga ngeblog. Belakangan ini cukup sibuk. Ambil 2 summer classes serta sempet ngacirrr liburan beberapa hari. Mudah-mudahan minggu depan udah bisa ngeblog lagi dengan ide segar dan sehat (kayak iklan susu aja)...

when God allows some days to happen

I don't know how should I call "today." There are some days in life where you just hope that it would not happen. Maybe I should say today is one of them. Hmm...
Two days ago I had a car breakdown. When I was about to leave campus it suddenly stopped. So yesterday I had to leave my car in Mazda dealership, since I would rather have their mechanics look my car thoroughly. I know that I got that car, a relatively not an old one, but with a much cheaper price and I realize that probably it would need some work someday. But please Lord not right now.... (grin). Anyway, today, I just found out that the cost to fix that car is probably equivalent to 90 hours payrate of work. Ok, I'm broke! Errrghhhh.... That's a big chunk of money, oh well... I know that God provides what I need. Amen. It's just one of those feeling while me being a student living in a foreign land, there are times when I cast doubt.

Ok, then I got back home. I was about to do my laundry work. Since I've just moved in to Peterson Manor, it's been a while since I last time did a laundry work here when I was just visiting previous times. I forgot that I should have separated my clothes in two batches of work. HA!!!!! Then my white clothes have their color messed up! Ugghhh. Sebel deh! Well, as the old saying: "the rice has now become porridge." What are you gonna do, eat 'em up!
Yo wes... At least I'm still grateful that there are only 3 "wounded" t-shirts anyway.

Then, I went to the gym to have a bit of exercise and to the pool for swimming, trying to ease up the hectic-ness of the day and relax a little bit. After I finished and grab my wallet and cellphone, suddenly there's an incoming text message from Bandung. I got a sad news from our home church. One of the board leaders just passed away at the ICU in Immanuel Hospital today at 4 am (WIB). Man, I almost can't believe it. He's not even close to 50 yet. He's one of the most humble and generous leader in our church. Many-many times I exchange emails with him when he update me about things in our church. I still remember when we talk via e-mail, he's always asked me when I return home so that we can continue God's work. I must say that I'm very surprised with his passing. He's in a much better place right now. Life is short indeed, although there are some days when we feel that it's soooo looongggg.

Revelation 7:17
For the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd; he will lead them to springs of living water. And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.


Yes, Lord, be the center of our heart, lead us to the springs of living waters, and we believe that you will wipe away every tear from our eyes.

new outlook

Ok, I've just changed my blog with a new look. It symbolizes another mundane transition in my life right now. As some of you probably have already known, I've been accepted at SBTS to continue my education. It has gone through a series of considerations, prayers, phone calls, emails, informations, dialogs/conversations. I've finally decided to sharpen my knowledge and experience in the area of music, in which I believe that I haven't really understand much at all. I'll drop by at some time with a more detail information. As for now, 'waiting' is the only word that suits here as I still have to face that 'placement test/exam' in August. Meanwhile, life in Louisville, Ky has been great. Yes, I do miss Lynchburg with all of its stories, and I'll come over to visit that place again, sometime....
I won't be able to come fly home this Summer and I can enjoy that, besides, there's plenty of things to do here... So, it's gonna be really interesting. Stay tune. By the way, maybe I can get some feedbacks, yeach I know .. I know... I'm still trying to figure out how to fix that dagger. Please bear with me as I'm still new.

gone

Saya terakhir udah bbrp hari menghilang kaga blogging, kecuali pas tanggal 18 dan kemarin. Pengangguran teladan nih ceritanya? Hehe.. ya dan tidak. Nih saya kasi tau ngapain aja selama seminggu ini:

Senin 21/5 - Istirahat dirumah seharian, mulai beres-beres. Sorenya ditelp Pastor David dia baru beli TV Flat Screen 51" minta saya bantu angkatin dari trucknya ke dlm rumah. Terus istrinya masak bikin baked chicken, hmm chickennya enak. Abis itu ya cipika cipiki ... namanya juga perpisahan....

Selasa 22/5 - Lynchburg bisa dibilang "lumpuh" total krn ada funeral service Dr. Falwell. Semua sekolah diliburin, traffic katanya bakal macet taunya super sepi. Semua orang pada gosip bhw President Bush dan Daddy Bush Sr. bakal hadir, eh ternyata kabarnya beneran dari burung alias boong. White House cuma kirim asistennya Bush. Ada Franklin Graham dan Rick Warren yg dateng. Gue tadinya mau ke TRBC ikut funeral service, tapi berhubung baru bangun jam 10.30, maka saya hadir di udara saja dlm doa dan putar TV untuk nonton acaranya, hehe.

Rabu 23/5 - Koran-koran heboh expose soal anak LU yg bawa bom molotov di mobilnya pas ikutan acara funeral, katanya itu utk ngewarning protester Dr Falwell. Itu anak bener2 kurang kerjaan. Hari Rabu saya diundang lunch, KOREAN BBQ, sama tiga cewek Korea sakti, Hye-Lim, Hye-Ryun, dan Skye. Gile tu BBQ asik banget.

Kamis 24/5 - Lanjut beres-beres dan packing2. Ben dateng ke rumah. Dia sejak minggu lalu udah pindah ke apartment barunya. Kmrn dia dateng dan kita sama2 beres2 dan bebersih di rumah sini. Sorenya pergi makan di Schmokeys Grill di Wyndhurst dgn Justin dan Lindsey, ini sandwich/burger khas-nya orang South. Pic-nya yang dibawah postingan ini.

Jumat 25/5 - Pagi tadi saya nongol di kantor sekolah, ceritanya pamitan sesuai janji krn hari ini kan Jumat, hari terakhir kerja sebelum weekend. Senin saya udah cabut dan disini public holiday so ga ada waktu lagi. Yah, tadi pelok2an dan cipika cipiki lagi dah sama para ibu2 kantor itu. Siangnya mampir ke Olive Garden.

Busyettt, beberapa hari terakhir ini saya jadi pengangguran teladan, yang artinya makan 2terusss. Maklum, sebentar lagi akan meninggalkan Lynchburg kota kecil tercinta, jadi di rumah Sandusky Drive ini lagi bertemakan packing-packing dan makan-makan. Saya bakal pindah demikian pula roommate saya, si mas Benjamin or "Dr Forrest."
Hari ini hari terakhir dia di Lynchburg karena besok subuh bakal terbang balik ke Idaho, the potato land. So pada mencar deh satu persatu. Ok gotta run some errands. I will post the updates.

At the end of the day

At the end of the day
When all papers go away
And lips just ain't enough to say
With friends going out each on their way

At the end of the day
When a dreamer passed away
A man of courage, wisdom, and passion that fully sway
A week full of memories in the month of May
A city where its skies turned to gray

At the end of the day
When all heads bowed down
When everyone looked to the Son
And thank Him for all that He has done

At the end of the day
When everybody’s gone
And I continue to move on
Reaching that vision, shining that beacon

At the end of the day
While looking at His shimmering ray
I hope my Master would say
“Well done, thou good and faithful servant,”

Lynchburg, May 2007